Geek For E!

Movie Review – “The Family”

With a dark comedy starring Robert De Niro, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Tommy Lee Jones and directed by Luc Benson you’d think that The Family would feel like a fun movie with an interesting fish-out-of-water premise. Yet it felt tired and old and really had no clue what it wanted to be but felt like something else that we’ve seen before. For every funny moment I laughed at, there were moments where I was comparing it to another movie or TV show that did it better. The Family manages to take ideas from The Sopranos, Red, and Lilyhammer, and mish-mash them up into a story that would have worked…if only they had gone in a different direction.

Click after the break to see my full review.

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Movie Review: Insidious 2

Remember how amazing The Exorcist was? Well, Insidious wasn’t exactly at that level of awesome, but it was pretty damn good. Remember how crappy Exorcist II: The Heretic was? Oh yeah. Same thing here. An amazing opening salvo, then a convoluted, sloppy mess of a sequel. It’s a shame, to see a Fangoria magazine Chainsaw Award-winning horror film devolve. It’s especially rough to see quality actors giving their all to a movie that feels like someone forgot what the plot was halfway in, and then just told everyone to wing it.

The initial premise of Insidious is that a demon has been hunting Josh Lambert (again played by Patrick Wilson), and being unable to possess him, tries it’s luck with his oldest son Dalton (Ty Simpkins). Wife/mother Renai (Rose Byrne) has to deal with all the demonic fallout, while trying to keep her other young children safe. When we last left the Lamberts, psychic Elise had been killed, presumably by Josh while he was possessed by…something. Lights out, credits roll.

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Movie Review: Elysium, 2013 (B-)

The makers of ‘District 9’ bring you a new type of future.  One where the rich and powerful live healthy and care free, while the poor and sick live with poverty and starvation…wait, are we talking about current day Earth or a bold new look at a future one?  Elysium is the supposed future, but you’ll feel like it’s the present day we live in.  B-

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Movie Review – “2 Guns”

Based on the Boom Studio’s comic of the same name, 2 Guns is a story about two undercover agents working toward the same cause but not knowing that each other is undercover for their respective Government Agency. DEA Agent Bobby Trench (Denzel Washington) is tasked with catching a drug king-pin from Mexico but also in trapping the “partner” he’s using to get to that goal. Naval Intelligence Agent Marcus Stigman (Mark Wahlberg) is tasked with the same thing. On their run from the cartel they find out that each is not who they say they are and that their common goal has taken on a twist that neither expected.

That plot may seem like it would make a great James Bond style movie with intrigue and action and adventure. But in 2 Guns we get a buddy-cop film with lots of laughs from Wahlberg’s character as Washington is the “straight” guy. It is a modern Riggs and Murtough with the interactions between Trench and Stigman and I could see them making a series out of these movies. And yes, I know that Boom Studios just released a 3 Guns sequel so who knows if material from that story will make it to the big screen but it wouldn’t surprise me if it did.

So what did I think of the movie? I’ll change it up this week and give you a tease before the break….it was lots of fun! Click below to keep on reading.

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Grade: 4 our of 5

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Movie Review – “The To Do List”

The To Do List is a coming-of-age movie that is a period piece with blocks of humor from another movie that actually took place six years later then when this movie takes place. Got it? Good! OK…I’ll get into more detail since you asked nicely. The To Do List is a coming-of-age movie set in the Summer of 1993 and follows Brandy Klark (Aubrey Plaza) as she moves from high school to college and realizes she has more to learn in the form of sex. Yes, this is another one of those teens need sex to be real adults and find themselves movie where they learn a lesson along the way. Along with those lessons we the audience are given touches of humor from 1999’s American Pie in the form of some crude sexual situations that actually result in most of the comedy of the film.

So what did I think? You know the drill so click below the picture and read my ramblings.

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MOVIE REVIEW: FRUITVALE STATION

In light of the events that have currently overtaken our media coverage, one would consider it hard to review a film like Fruitvale Station without mentioning them and turning this entry into a political commentary. Lucky for you, I don’t fancy myself a journalist nor do I maintain an educated political opinion. I steer clear of the news and the feeding frenzy it makes of people’s lives. Given my personal choice to remain ignorant, I am going to leave politics out and will stick to what I know. I know what a good film looks like, and Fruitvale Station lives up to the Sundance award-winning hype. I went into the theatre only having read a brief synopsis about the movie, and I came out broken hearted.

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Movie Review: The Wolverine

Hugh Jackman is RIPPED y’all!  Okay, now that I’ve stated the obvious, is this second foray into Wolverine’s story worth the trip to the multiplex when there’s so many other superhero flicks out/slated for this year?  Sure, you could just look at IMDb and say “James Mangold directed?  He did Walk The Line!”  You could go with that, but remember; he also did Kate & Leopold.  *shudder*  I’m here with more intel; The Wolverine is definitely worth skipping Pacific Rim for another week…for.  In other words, it’s an artfully shot bit of cinematic beauty that manages to tell an epic story (epic in the Hollywood sense; this is definitely a Hero’s Journey flick) where the action comes fast and frequent, and the title character is crafted well enough that you want to know more about him, and root for his success.  Of course Jackman’s biceps don’t hurt that cause any.

The Wolverine starts us out with poor Logan’s nightmares, and as this story begins shortly after the occurrences in X-Men: The Last Stand, he’s got a lot of scary rattling around in his brain.  Still reeling from killing the love of his life, Jean Grey, he’s also replaying other dark times in his past.  Like the time he was in Nagasaki during WWII, when the Allied Forces dropped THE bomb.  Logan manages to survive, and saves Yashida, a young Japanese Army soldier (Ken Yamamura) that was too scared to commit seppuku with the rest of his bretheren.  Flash forward to the present day and Yashida (now played by Hal Yamanouchi) is dying, and wants to see Logan to say goodbye.  As Logan is very busy beating himself up emotionally, it takes quite a bit of persuading (and a good deal of emotional blackmail) by Yashida’s emmisary Yukio (Rila Fukushima, a funny and badass scene stealer whenever she’s onscreen).

But at last Logan heads to Japan.  However, we all know it’s not gonna be a simple goodbye, right?  Right.  Logan gets himself into trouble with the Yakuza, who want to kidnap Yashida’s granddaughter Mariko (Tao Okamoto), as well as a mutant with some truly killer powers.  That’d be Viper, played by Svetlana Khodchenckova (Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy), and she’s a nasty piece of work, though she works a latex bodysuit like nobody’s business.  Yeah, there’s a ton of stuff going on in The Wolverine, and it all fits together by the time the credits roll.  But this ain’t the kind of superhero movie where you can just let the action wash over you; in order to reap the maximum benefit, you’ve gotta pay attention.  The stories are twisty, turny affairs that make you work for your ah-ha moments.  Are most of those moments ones you can spot easily if you’re paying attention?  Absolutely.  But dang if Mangold doesn’t make it a fun trip.

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Movie Review: The Conjuring

“From ghoulies and ghosties. And long-leggedy beasties. And things that go bump in the night, Good Lord, deliver us!”

The Scots have a great prayer there.  And for decades, real-life couple Ed and Lorraine Warren did their level best to help folks who suffered from beyond-the-norm problems.  The Conjuring is a film that gives the couple the big screen treatment…and it’s a throwback to the good ol’ fashioned scare-you-pantsless spookfests of the 70s.  Loved The Changeling, Ghost Story and The Amityville Horror (which, by the way, is also a case the Warrens worked on…)?  Baby, you’re gonna love The Conjuring.  This film starts off with an opening sequence that takes off with a serious case of spooky, giving the audience a heads-up; this is gonna be a bumpy night.  Oh yes, yes it is.  Okay I’ll say it; The Conjuring is looking like the best horror film of 2013.  And yes, that’s taking into account the Evil Dead remake earlier this year, the fact that a new Carrie is coming to town for Halloween, and that Director James Wan’s Insidious: Chapter 2 hits theaters this September.

The story is simple; a couple (Lili Taylor and Ron Livingston)  sinks their savings into a house that’s roomy enough for them their five girls.  Said roomy house starts with the creepy occurrences almost right off the bat.  After one particularly harsh night of bangs, thumps and physical attacks, the family call on paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga) for help.  But the Warrens have handled a few cases that have taken a toll on Lorraine — including a creepy doll that tried to kill it’s owners — and this may be one too many.  And even so, it’s going to take a lot to figure out what’s going on at the Perron house, along with the why, and how to get it to stop….

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Movie Review – “Grown Ups 2”

Love him or hate him, Adam Sandler has come a long way from his small part on The Cosby Show as Theo’s friend. He has gone on to make massive hits as well as movies that seemed that they were made just to be made. But as hard as it is to believe, Grown Ups 2 is the first sequel he’s been involved with for any of his movies and one that shows that Sandler cares about the characters.

The movie is a look into a day of the lives of these friends as they are preparing for the Summer with the last day of school for the kids. It’s a non-stop look as the families grow along with friendships that bridge between generations of family. So how did it fare? You know the drill….

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Grade: 3 our of 5 [Read more…]

Movie Review: Pacific Rim

Big-ass monsters!  Ginormous robots!  Tons of things getting crunched, blown up and otherwise decimated!  Then why didn’t I love Pacific Rim?  That’s the question that rattled around in my head as I left the theater.  For all of it’s glorious spectacle — and there’s an awful lot of glorious spectacle here — Pacific Rim is like the giant “Jaeger” robots that the film focuses on; beautiful, awe-inspiring but hollow.

That’s not to say that there isn’t fun to be had here.  This is the perfect movie to turn off your brain (seriously; giant mechanical robots fighting kaiju?  It’s the perfect summer blockbuster) and dig into the Good ‘n Plentys.  But if you’re searching for heart and soul in this robot, you’re outta luck.  Pacific Rim plays it straight throughout it’s 2 hours plus, which lets a lot of the fun leak out of the film.  What this movie needed was more tongue-in-cheek.  Yes, there are a few bits of humor here and there, but when it happens it feels more like a transplant from a different film than an integral part of the story.

And the story has definite promise.  It’s the year 2020, seven years after gigantic creatures started to rise from the depths of the Pacific (probably the super-deep Marina Trench, though I’m not sure if it’s ever pinpointed).  “The Breach”, as it’s called, is a rift between worlds that allow these kaiju (Japanese for “strange beast”, for those not in the know) into our world.  And these ginormous Godzilla nightmares have one thing on their mind; the destruction of the human race.  Naturally.

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